When you feel like being stingy, give more than you intended.
When you feel like withholding helpful information, find more people to share it with.
When someone needs a referral, don’t ponder too long, if it feels right in your “gut” go with it.
There is a breakthrough that takes you past any resistance when you choose to give to others.
What you make happen for someone else you are actually making happen for yourself.
Give without expectation that the receiver will give back to you.
It builds strength of character and uncommon confidence when you give knowing that it will eventually come back to you, but you don’t necessarily know through whom.
You will have more joy and fulfillment in your day when you choose to give to others in a positive way.
Lift someone’s spirit by giving the positive comment that you wanted to hold back.
Be the first to initiate a kind word or a smile to a friend, co-worker, associate, or total stranger, even if they don’t give it back.
Look at people when you talk to them today and really listen to what they have to say.
When you respond to that e-mail, take a little extra time and find a creative way to convey a soothing “tone”.
Your words and actions are more powerful than you could know. You actually don’t know exactly what someone else may be going through. On the exterior they may look like a kingly lion, but on the inside they may feel like a whipped pup. Go ahead and take the time today to give someone else a “pick me up”.
Forgive people more than they deserve.
Love people past their mistakes.
The return on your investment will overwhelm you in time, if you consistently pour positivity in to someone else and the challenges that they may be facing.
Be uncommon today, be a giver.
Comeback Question:
Who could use your kindness today?
What one small action could you do to help make a big difference for them?
Craig L. Sanders
The Comeback Specialist
http://www.craiglsanders.com/
10/8/10
10/7/10
Shift Gears
The potential of an automotive engine is unleashed and increased by the action of gear shifting.
Regardless of the mode of transportation that you use on a regular basis there is no doubt some mechanism of acceleration involved. Otherwise, you would not be using that method of transportation.
The average person wants to get where they are going faster not slower.
The same is true for our personal and professional destinies. Destiny according to dictionary.com is “fate” or “a predetermined course of events.”
We can “predetermine” to have a positive “fate” or outcome by the actions that we choose to take on a daily basis.
We can accelerate the pace of the positive outcomes that we experience by choosing to shift gears.
We can take our innate potential, our natural strengths, our developed skill sets and shift to new levels.
When an NBA point guard is dealing with a full court press defensive scheme against him in the midst of a basketball game, he will often shift gears and “push” the ball forward faster to break the “press”. He will push against the thing, i.e., the defense, that is pushing against him in order to arrive at his desired destination, which is the other end of the basketball court in order to have an opportunity to score.
Sometimes you don’t have to “learn” something totally new in order to be effective, you just have to do what you know to do at a higher or more intense level. In sales, it is often necessary to make emphatic and convincing points with passion that effectively persuade the potential buyer. When you are speaking with a family member that doesn’t seem to respond to the 1st gear of your communication, you may find it necessary to shift up to 3rd or 4th gear until they understand where you are coming from.
Shifting gears in the midst of your day can be exhilarating and fun. It is exciting and reassuring to know that at any given moment, you have untapped potential at your disposal that you can put into play. All it takes is a decision and a corresponding action.
Assess your current situation, and determine if you need to shift gears and accelerate. It may be the very key that allows you to manifest your destiny at a faster rate.
Comeback Question:
What actions do you take when you need a “breakthrough” in a certain area of life or business?
Craig L. Sanders
The Comeback Specialist
http://www.craiglsanders.com/
Regardless of the mode of transportation that you use on a regular basis there is no doubt some mechanism of acceleration involved. Otherwise, you would not be using that method of transportation.
The average person wants to get where they are going faster not slower.
The same is true for our personal and professional destinies. Destiny according to dictionary.com is “fate” or “a predetermined course of events.”
We can “predetermine” to have a positive “fate” or outcome by the actions that we choose to take on a daily basis.
We can accelerate the pace of the positive outcomes that we experience by choosing to shift gears.
We can take our innate potential, our natural strengths, our developed skill sets and shift to new levels.
When an NBA point guard is dealing with a full court press defensive scheme against him in the midst of a basketball game, he will often shift gears and “push” the ball forward faster to break the “press”. He will push against the thing, i.e., the defense, that is pushing against him in order to arrive at his desired destination, which is the other end of the basketball court in order to have an opportunity to score.
Sometimes you don’t have to “learn” something totally new in order to be effective, you just have to do what you know to do at a higher or more intense level. In sales, it is often necessary to make emphatic and convincing points with passion that effectively persuade the potential buyer. When you are speaking with a family member that doesn’t seem to respond to the 1st gear of your communication, you may find it necessary to shift up to 3rd or 4th gear until they understand where you are coming from.
Shifting gears in the midst of your day can be exhilarating and fun. It is exciting and reassuring to know that at any given moment, you have untapped potential at your disposal that you can put into play. All it takes is a decision and a corresponding action.
Assess your current situation, and determine if you need to shift gears and accelerate. It may be the very key that allows you to manifest your destiny at a faster rate.
Comeback Question:
What actions do you take when you need a “breakthrough” in a certain area of life or business?
Craig L. Sanders
The Comeback Specialist
http://www.craiglsanders.com/
10/6/10
Live in the Moment
There is no better time than the present.
We cannot do anything about yesterday.
When tomorrow gets here we will call it “today”.
There is no need to worry about tomorrow, because we have enough to keep us busy today.
To be honest, this moment right here, right now is all we have.
Many people get “stressed out” or overwhelmed when they step out of the present moment and try to deal with the past or start trying to live in the future.
Don’t get me wrong, there is a place for processing the past and for planning for the future, but when we slip into anxiety and worry regarding the past or future we have slipped out of balance.
It is virtually impossible to be upset, anxious, angry, or worried if we focus on living in the moment. I’m not even talking about living in “today”. I’m talking about living in the very moment that you are in which happens to be encapsulated in a package called “today”.
When you catch yourself getting upset when you are speaking with a co-worker, vendor, associate, or family member, there is no need to escalate the situation. There is no need to “beat up” on yourself for realizing that you slipped into “upset” mode. Just simply take a deep breath, relax, close your eyes, and live in the moment.
Be right here, right now in every sense of the word. It is possible to control your thoughts and emotions. I find the most effective way to control my emotions is to say something positive out loud. When I am tempted to think a negative or fearful thought when faced with a sizeable task, or if someone says, “Wow, that’s a big challenge, I don’t know if you can make it.” I simply respond out loud, “We can do this!” or “We’ll figure it out!” I get excited about getting into the moment.
Change happens inside of the moment.
Answers arise inside of the moment.
Peace and calm come inside of the moment.
Your uncommon future unfolds inside of the moment.
I challenge you right now to live in the moment.
Comeback Question:
What is the most effective way that you have found to reduce your stress level on a daily basis?
Craig L. Sanders
The Comeback Specialist
http://www.craiglsanders.com/
We cannot do anything about yesterday.
When tomorrow gets here we will call it “today”.
There is no need to worry about tomorrow, because we have enough to keep us busy today.
To be honest, this moment right here, right now is all we have.
Many people get “stressed out” or overwhelmed when they step out of the present moment and try to deal with the past or start trying to live in the future.
Don’t get me wrong, there is a place for processing the past and for planning for the future, but when we slip into anxiety and worry regarding the past or future we have slipped out of balance.
It is virtually impossible to be upset, anxious, angry, or worried if we focus on living in the moment. I’m not even talking about living in “today”. I’m talking about living in the very moment that you are in which happens to be encapsulated in a package called “today”.
When you catch yourself getting upset when you are speaking with a co-worker, vendor, associate, or family member, there is no need to escalate the situation. There is no need to “beat up” on yourself for realizing that you slipped into “upset” mode. Just simply take a deep breath, relax, close your eyes, and live in the moment.
Be right here, right now in every sense of the word. It is possible to control your thoughts and emotions. I find the most effective way to control my emotions is to say something positive out loud. When I am tempted to think a negative or fearful thought when faced with a sizeable task, or if someone says, “Wow, that’s a big challenge, I don’t know if you can make it.” I simply respond out loud, “We can do this!” or “We’ll figure it out!” I get excited about getting into the moment.
Change happens inside of the moment.
Answers arise inside of the moment.
Peace and calm come inside of the moment.
Your uncommon future unfolds inside of the moment.
I challenge you right now to live in the moment.
Comeback Question:
What is the most effective way that you have found to reduce your stress level on a daily basis?
Craig L. Sanders
The Comeback Specialist
http://www.craiglsanders.com/
10/5/10
Take Your Game to the Next Level
“Follow effective action with quiet reflection. From the quiet reflection will come even more effective action.” –Peter F. Drucker
Regardless of if we have had a recent “win” or a recent “loss”, we can take our game, i.e., our businesses, careers, families, and personal lives, to the next level.
Winning teams and individuals find ways to elevate their performance through hard work, expanding their knowledge, or getting coaching on a particular area.
We can actually find inspiration in each situation regardless of whether it feels “good” or “bad”.
It doesn’t matter what the recent result was, it matters what we do after the result. The results, “good” or “bad” are what they are, but in order to improve results, we must improve ourselves.
We can turn any circumstance in our favor, especially if we learn from it.
We can learn what to do and what not to do. We can learn from watching the successes and setbacks of others.
We can actually maintain momentum in the midst of an apparent “defeat” and accelerate momentum after a recent “win”, especially when we extract the knowledge that the recent event is offering us. We can do this be doing reflection and self-inquiry.
We can ask ourselves, “What could I have done better…why did I get that particular result…what small change will accelerate my progress for the next go round?”
It is not always the big changes that yield big results, it is often the minor adjustments that seem to move insurmountable mountains.
Author and speaker, Mike Murdock says, “Small keys open big doors.” Use the knowledge from your most recent results, make minor adjustments, take your game to the next level, and enjoy continued success.
Craig L. Sanders
The Comeback Specialist
http://www.craiglsanders.com/
Regardless of if we have had a recent “win” or a recent “loss”, we can take our game, i.e., our businesses, careers, families, and personal lives, to the next level.
Winning teams and individuals find ways to elevate their performance through hard work, expanding their knowledge, or getting coaching on a particular area.
We can actually find inspiration in each situation regardless of whether it feels “good” or “bad”.
It doesn’t matter what the recent result was, it matters what we do after the result. The results, “good” or “bad” are what they are, but in order to improve results, we must improve ourselves.
We can turn any circumstance in our favor, especially if we learn from it.
We can learn what to do and what not to do. We can learn from watching the successes and setbacks of others.
We can actually maintain momentum in the midst of an apparent “defeat” and accelerate momentum after a recent “win”, especially when we extract the knowledge that the recent event is offering us. We can do this be doing reflection and self-inquiry.
We can ask ourselves, “What could I have done better…why did I get that particular result…what small change will accelerate my progress for the next go round?”
It is not always the big changes that yield big results, it is often the minor adjustments that seem to move insurmountable mountains.
Author and speaker, Mike Murdock says, “Small keys open big doors.” Use the knowledge from your most recent results, make minor adjustments, take your game to the next level, and enjoy continued success.
Craig L. Sanders
The Comeback Specialist
http://www.craiglsanders.com/
10/4/10
Manage Change Daily
“To change your life, change something you do in your daily routine.” –Mike Murdock
Change can be a challenge to our minds, our careers, our businesses, and our families.
Change is a lot easier to deal with if it is understood that change must happen and will happen whether we “like” it or not.
Change is a lot easier to deal with when we realize change does not have to be dreaded; we can actually welcome and look forward to change.
Change is a lot easier to deal with when we put systems in place to manage it.
The reason that we don’t have to fear chaos is that we do have the power to create order.
Creating order is a form of management.
We can manage change. One of the easiest ways to manage change is to manage it daily.
We can make smoother transitions in the midst of a course adjustment by daily oversight of our activity.
If we try to change one habit on a daily, gradual basis, we will make significant and accelerated progress.
Managing “problem” areas in our lives, careers, and businesses on a daily basis will take mountains down to the size of mole hills.
Areas of our lives, careers, and businesses that once seemed insurmountable and impossible now become accomplished areas of improvement and progress, all because we chipped away at the problem a little bit every day.
Take a significant area of your life, business, family, or career that you would like to see change in and act like it is a game. Act like it is not really a big deal and that it is a “project” that you will make progress on a little bit at a time. Think of it as a masterpiece that you are creating just like a world-class sculptor, painter, or composer. You make a little change here today, a minor adjustment there tomorrow, and before you know it the area that was once a problem now has found a workable solution.
Change may often “feel” uncomfortable but you can make it work for you if you manage change daily.
Be aggressive about making the changes that are needed in your life, business, or career. Get excited about it, put a plan and system in place, get to work on the area of challenge and make daily progress. Before you know it, you will likely make a beautiful masterpiece out of what was once a horrendous mess. Positive change can often happen for you when you decide to manage change daily with consistent and effective activity. You only have to commit to do it, one day at a time.
Comeback Questions:
What area of your life needs the most change?
What small action can you implement today that will bring change to this area of your life?
Simply commit to do this same action tomorrow and repeat the process daily until the area changes.
Craig L. Sanders
The Comeback Specialist
http://www.craiglsanders.com/
Change can be a challenge to our minds, our careers, our businesses, and our families.
Change is a lot easier to deal with if it is understood that change must happen and will happen whether we “like” it or not.
Change is a lot easier to deal with when we realize change does not have to be dreaded; we can actually welcome and look forward to change.
Change is a lot easier to deal with when we put systems in place to manage it.
The reason that we don’t have to fear chaos is that we do have the power to create order.
Creating order is a form of management.
We can manage change. One of the easiest ways to manage change is to manage it daily.
We can make smoother transitions in the midst of a course adjustment by daily oversight of our activity.
If we try to change one habit on a daily, gradual basis, we will make significant and accelerated progress.
Managing “problem” areas in our lives, careers, and businesses on a daily basis will take mountains down to the size of mole hills.
Areas of our lives, careers, and businesses that once seemed insurmountable and impossible now become accomplished areas of improvement and progress, all because we chipped away at the problem a little bit every day.
Take a significant area of your life, business, family, or career that you would like to see change in and act like it is a game. Act like it is not really a big deal and that it is a “project” that you will make progress on a little bit at a time. Think of it as a masterpiece that you are creating just like a world-class sculptor, painter, or composer. You make a little change here today, a minor adjustment there tomorrow, and before you know it the area that was once a problem now has found a workable solution.
Change may often “feel” uncomfortable but you can make it work for you if you manage change daily.
Be aggressive about making the changes that are needed in your life, business, or career. Get excited about it, put a plan and system in place, get to work on the area of challenge and make daily progress. Before you know it, you will likely make a beautiful masterpiece out of what was once a horrendous mess. Positive change can often happen for you when you decide to manage change daily with consistent and effective activity. You only have to commit to do it, one day at a time.
Comeback Questions:
What area of your life needs the most change?
What small action can you implement today that will bring change to this area of your life?
Simply commit to do this same action tomorrow and repeat the process daily until the area changes.
Craig L. Sanders
The Comeback Specialist
http://www.craiglsanders.com/
10/3/10
Make Course Adjustments
“Change is inevitable, misery is optional.” –Unknown
It is said that airplane pilots spend more time off course than on course. It is said that they spend the majority of their time making course adjustments.
It is not that they have done or are doing anything wrong. It is just that it comes with the territory.
Pilots are human. Humans are imperfect. We are all imperfect humans that live in an imperfect world.
Therefore, course adjustments are a part of the deal.
If we set out on a project with a certain end-goal in mind, it may be likely that several changes, adjustments, and modifications will be required to successfully reach the goal.
Making changes is not a negative thing. It is interesting that we often perceive change as being negative. We perceive it as a sign that something is wrong with us or our family or our company. We often take it intensely personal.
This is actually a “normal” reaction to change. However, it does not mean that it is “right”. We have to understand how our minds work. We are creatures of habit. Anytime our habit or routine is challenged to change our minds send a signal to our central nervous system that something uncomfortable is taking place. We sense a feeling of stress, a twinge in our stomach, a thought that brings displeasure, or something similar.
This is no big deal. We should never fear chaos because we have the power to create order. We can take authority over our thoughts, feelings, and emotions at any given time and take the actions that are necessary. We have the power to take the proper course of action that will “right the ship”, and keep us on the proper pathway of success.
I have found personally that once I can admit that I don’t “have it all together” and that I need help, and that change is a good thing, I find that I can make it through the process a lot easier.
Making course adjustments is a beautiful thing. It keeps us fresh, creative, and constantly growing. Change comes to make us better, not bitter.
I encourage you to welcome change. Don’t be thrown off kilter just because someone threw you a curve ball. Learn from whatever event that has taken place, make the needed adjustment, and move on down the road of success.
Pilots have to adjust what is known in aviation as there “attitudes”. If they do not adjust their attitudes, i.e., flying instruments, then they place themselves and their precious cargo at great risk. Pilots know the importance of adjusting to the atmosphere and the elements. The same is true for us. We should be confident and bold, but humble enough to make changes when needed. Our attitudes should be positive and pliable, not negative and brittle. In the long run it will help us and those that are with us to reach our desired destinations successfully and safely.
Comeback Questions:
What is your biggest challenge to accepting change?
What is the most effective way to overcome this challenge?
Craig L. Sanders
The Comeback Specialist
http://www.craiglsanders.com/
It is said that airplane pilots spend more time off course than on course. It is said that they spend the majority of their time making course adjustments.
It is not that they have done or are doing anything wrong. It is just that it comes with the territory.
Pilots are human. Humans are imperfect. We are all imperfect humans that live in an imperfect world.
Therefore, course adjustments are a part of the deal.
If we set out on a project with a certain end-goal in mind, it may be likely that several changes, adjustments, and modifications will be required to successfully reach the goal.
Making changes is not a negative thing. It is interesting that we often perceive change as being negative. We perceive it as a sign that something is wrong with us or our family or our company. We often take it intensely personal.
This is actually a “normal” reaction to change. However, it does not mean that it is “right”. We have to understand how our minds work. We are creatures of habit. Anytime our habit or routine is challenged to change our minds send a signal to our central nervous system that something uncomfortable is taking place. We sense a feeling of stress, a twinge in our stomach, a thought that brings displeasure, or something similar.
This is no big deal. We should never fear chaos because we have the power to create order. We can take authority over our thoughts, feelings, and emotions at any given time and take the actions that are necessary. We have the power to take the proper course of action that will “right the ship”, and keep us on the proper pathway of success.
I have found personally that once I can admit that I don’t “have it all together” and that I need help, and that change is a good thing, I find that I can make it through the process a lot easier.
Making course adjustments is a beautiful thing. It keeps us fresh, creative, and constantly growing. Change comes to make us better, not bitter.
I encourage you to welcome change. Don’t be thrown off kilter just because someone threw you a curve ball. Learn from whatever event that has taken place, make the needed adjustment, and move on down the road of success.
Pilots have to adjust what is known in aviation as there “attitudes”. If they do not adjust their attitudes, i.e., flying instruments, then they place themselves and their precious cargo at great risk. Pilots know the importance of adjusting to the atmosphere and the elements. The same is true for us. We should be confident and bold, but humble enough to make changes when needed. Our attitudes should be positive and pliable, not negative and brittle. In the long run it will help us and those that are with us to reach our desired destinations successfully and safely.
Comeback Questions:
What is your biggest challenge to accepting change?
What is the most effective way to overcome this challenge?
Craig L. Sanders
The Comeback Specialist
http://www.craiglsanders.com/
10/2/10
Make a Good Catch
In football a good catch is not determined by how pretty, athletic, or elegant a catch was. A good catch is one that is caught, one that is held onto until the play is over. When a quarterback throws the football to a receiver and the receiver successfully catches the ball it is called a “completion”.
There are no extra points given for style or if you caught it with one hand, or almost dropped it but held onto it. The point is did you catch the ball?
The same is true for your personal pursuits or business ventures. Make a good catch, not a perfect catch, not a pretty catch, not an impressive catch; just make a catch. Start the project and complete the project.
Launch the business idea, get it started. Start the new initiative in your department. Lead your family in that exciting new direction. Go take the night or weekend class. Write the book. Start the blog. Create the new fashion line. Bake the cake. Go for the new position. Start the new fitness program. Take the vacation. Go get the new client. Whatever it is, just make a good catch. Get it started and get it completed.
Effective entrepreneurs, professionals, and people in general make good catches. They get things done. They do the best that they can at the time. They believe in excellence, not perfection.
Perfectionism may be responsible for killing more dreams than anything else.
You don’t have to be great, just good enough; good enough to get the job done with the best level of excellence that you can muster at that time.
If you were walking on a sidewalk and slipped on a banana peel but didn’t quite fall to the ground, that’s a good catch. If you did happen to fall to the ground you would probably get back up and go at it again. That is still a good catch because I am very confident that you would have learned from the slight mishap. Anytime that you learn from a mishap or a setback it’s a good catch. In our personal and professional lives there may be proverbial banana peels that seem to lie in our pathways, little “hiccups” along the way. There is no need to stop or quit, it’s merely a minor delay. Throw the ball, make a good catch, and advance your team and yourself into new victory.
Comeback Question: What is the best way to recover after a setback?
Craig L. Sanders
The Comeback Specialist
http://www.craiglsanders.com/
There are no extra points given for style or if you caught it with one hand, or almost dropped it but held onto it. The point is did you catch the ball?
The same is true for your personal pursuits or business ventures. Make a good catch, not a perfect catch, not a pretty catch, not an impressive catch; just make a catch. Start the project and complete the project.
Launch the business idea, get it started. Start the new initiative in your department. Lead your family in that exciting new direction. Go take the night or weekend class. Write the book. Start the blog. Create the new fashion line. Bake the cake. Go for the new position. Start the new fitness program. Take the vacation. Go get the new client. Whatever it is, just make a good catch. Get it started and get it completed.
Effective entrepreneurs, professionals, and people in general make good catches. They get things done. They do the best that they can at the time. They believe in excellence, not perfection.
Perfectionism may be responsible for killing more dreams than anything else.
You don’t have to be great, just good enough; good enough to get the job done with the best level of excellence that you can muster at that time.
If you were walking on a sidewalk and slipped on a banana peel but didn’t quite fall to the ground, that’s a good catch. If you did happen to fall to the ground you would probably get back up and go at it again. That is still a good catch because I am very confident that you would have learned from the slight mishap. Anytime that you learn from a mishap or a setback it’s a good catch. In our personal and professional lives there may be proverbial banana peels that seem to lie in our pathways, little “hiccups” along the way. There is no need to stop or quit, it’s merely a minor delay. Throw the ball, make a good catch, and advance your team and yourself into new victory.
Comeback Question: What is the best way to recover after a setback?
Craig L. Sanders
The Comeback Specialist
http://www.craiglsanders.com/
10/1/10
You Can Do More Than What You Give Yourself Credit For
You can do more than you give yourself credit for.
Failure is not final.
An attempt that does not align with your target does not mean you have to bail on your efforts.
If you slipped off your diet or missed an “important” appointment or whatever your blunder happens to be, stop adding “back-story” to it. “Back-story” is all the negative internal and external things that we tell ourselves as to what this failed attempt means. Like a virtual news reporter here are some of the back-stories we tell ourselves: “This happened because I’m just stupid…I can’t believe I was dumb enough to…I’m an idiot…I’m not good enough to win that account…”, etc.
Why does it have to “mean” something? Why can’t it just be a mistake? Why do we have to wrap your entire self-worth around an event that didn’t go the way we wanted it to? Why do we choose to get on the fear and self-loathing ride that is going nowhere but down, and really fast?
These things don’t have to be. The first thing that usually happens when we make a mistake of whatever nature it happens to be is that, we are complete and utter “failures”, unworthy of the air that we are breathing.
When we jump on this train of thought what usually happens is that we settle for things that we really don’t want.
We want more, we want higher and better but we can’t. Why? Well, because we “failed” of course. This is garbage. A failed attempt is nothing more than feedback on what may not be the best route to take in a particular endeavor. Rejection is nothing more than positive redirection.
Learn to give yourself credit for the good things that are in you, the good things that you’ve done, and the good things that you can create. To say that no one is perfect is stating the obvious. That is what personal development is all about. The people that get on in this life are those that acknowledge where they missed it and they simply take actions to fix it. It’s that hard and it’s that easy.
In business, career, relationships, health, finances, or whatever area you can possibly think of, give yourself credit. Every attempt may not be a home run, but if you don’t step up to the plate it is guaranteed that you will never hit one. Baseball legend, Babe Ruth said, “Every strike brings me closer to the next home run.” Every unsuccessful attempt brings you closer to a better result if you learn from it. So what if you failed on that particular attempt, at least you tried. Plus, look how far you’ve come, not how far you have left to go. Celebrate your progress.
Give yourself credit, stop wrapping twisted self-loathing stories around unsuccessful attempts and step up to the plate and take another swing. It’s time to play the game of life. Sitting on the bench because of a poor performance isn’t helping you or the team, i.e., the people that are counting on you.
Craig L. Sanders
The Comeback Specialist
www.craiglsanders.com
Failure is not final.
An attempt that does not align with your target does not mean you have to bail on your efforts.
If you slipped off your diet or missed an “important” appointment or whatever your blunder happens to be, stop adding “back-story” to it. “Back-story” is all the negative internal and external things that we tell ourselves as to what this failed attempt means. Like a virtual news reporter here are some of the back-stories we tell ourselves: “This happened because I’m just stupid…I can’t believe I was dumb enough to…I’m an idiot…I’m not good enough to win that account…”, etc.
Why does it have to “mean” something? Why can’t it just be a mistake? Why do we have to wrap your entire self-worth around an event that didn’t go the way we wanted it to? Why do we choose to get on the fear and self-loathing ride that is going nowhere but down, and really fast?
These things don’t have to be. The first thing that usually happens when we make a mistake of whatever nature it happens to be is that, we are complete and utter “failures”, unworthy of the air that we are breathing.
When we jump on this train of thought what usually happens is that we settle for things that we really don’t want.
We want more, we want higher and better but we can’t. Why? Well, because we “failed” of course. This is garbage. A failed attempt is nothing more than feedback on what may not be the best route to take in a particular endeavor. Rejection is nothing more than positive redirection.
Learn to give yourself credit for the good things that are in you, the good things that you’ve done, and the good things that you can create. To say that no one is perfect is stating the obvious. That is what personal development is all about. The people that get on in this life are those that acknowledge where they missed it and they simply take actions to fix it. It’s that hard and it’s that easy.
In business, career, relationships, health, finances, or whatever area you can possibly think of, give yourself credit. Every attempt may not be a home run, but if you don’t step up to the plate it is guaranteed that you will never hit one. Baseball legend, Babe Ruth said, “Every strike brings me closer to the next home run.” Every unsuccessful attempt brings you closer to a better result if you learn from it. So what if you failed on that particular attempt, at least you tried. Plus, look how far you’ve come, not how far you have left to go. Celebrate your progress.
Give yourself credit, stop wrapping twisted self-loathing stories around unsuccessful attempts and step up to the plate and take another swing. It’s time to play the game of life. Sitting on the bench because of a poor performance isn’t helping you or the team, i.e., the people that are counting on you.
Craig L. Sanders
The Comeback Specialist
www.craiglsanders.com
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